Thursday, October 16, 2008


Good lord.
People say that little girls whine. As a young child, I was always told to quit whining... especially by my dad and my brother, to which I would reply in the most high pitched voice I could muster, "I'm NOT Whiiiiiiiinnnniiingggggggg-uh!"
Whats funny is that almost any whined word is followed immediately by the syllable, "UH".
Try it. "Give it heeeeerrrreeeee-uh!" try again, "It's not Miiiiiiinnnneee-uh!"
"Leave me alooooooooooooooooone-Uh!"

I think its because we have to grunt to get the whine out. whines are so forced, so frustarated. A whined word is one that resents having to be uttered... never should have to have been spoken, which should have been known before it was incited... by the person eliciting the whine in the first place. Usually a parent of some sort.

Rarely does a teacher hear the whine.

The whine is annoying, and makes communication difficult.

But I will maintain that girls are not the whiners. There is a creature out there that is FAR whinier than the little girl who doesnt get the doll she wants at the store.

There is one creature who utters 99% of all whines that cause sound.

I have said this long before I ever had one, the whiniest creature of all is the eleven year old boy.

And now I have one.
Oh I saw it coming. Not because there was some sort of warning sign, but because I had the joy of working with all ages of kids at a shelter for homeless kids.
Now, if anyone has anything to whine about, its orphans. For sure.
But time and time again, I found myself bristling up the back due to one genre of orphan. the eleven year old boy orphan, and I have suspected that this affliction extends to eleven year old boys with families as well.
And it turns out my suspicions are correct.
Now they don't do it around their friends, but they will do it when any mixed group with adults and kids. And they will do it constantly. They are now the self elected announcers on what is and is not fair in the world.
And there going to tell you.
"No FAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIR-uh!!!!! He got more than me" to which you should always reply, "what are you Monk??? Its upsetting the natural order of the universe because your brother got one skittle more than you did?"
and the eleven year old boy will inevitably say, "GOOOOOOODDDDDDD-UH!"

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

My son's teacher emailed me a few weeks ago, asking if I could please set the date/time option for his meter for the correct time.
I hit the "reply" button and started typing away, as I often do before I even have time to think about what I just read... I typed, "which meter? the pink one touch, the green one touch, the one touch ultra smart, the one touch ultra that is round with a yellowish screen, or one of the accuchecks, and by the way have you seen the green one touch anywhere lately?"
But then I hit the delete key, and watched everything I just said go away. Sometimes I wish I could do that in real life...
We do have a lot of meters.... and for a kid like Nolan, who loses at least one kit a day, we need them, or we will be spending all day looking for that little black zipper bag... yelling at each other. I lose stuff too, as does my husband... Actually, I lock my keys in my car. James loses his wallet and checkbook, Nolan loses his kit and his homework and his backpack and anything else he needs. Things just dont stick to him, or his dad. They should be nudists.

Anyway, I erased my words, because I thought first, "why does she need the time to be set... he doesnt use a meter that communicates with his pump..."

I thought naively for a while on that... then I thought... OH. wait.
I get it.
She thinks he is "faking" when he is low.
She is checking up on him, despite what my care plan said.
Despite the fact that I told her that even if he has a normal number, he may still need to treat if he feels low.
That skanky bitch.
I told her... under NO uncertian terms, that he does NOT fake lows, and that even if you think he is faking, even if you KNOW he is, you let that kid treat, because you may be making a grave error.

So I wrote back,
"no. I am not going to waste any time doing that. He has a continous glucose monitor on, and I download that info, the only other reason for doing that is so I can download and find patterns.... He has so many meters, some reset themselves here and there, the battery cover comes off, and suddenly it is november first, 2002 again, so... I dont mess with them these days.
Does it bother you when clocks are set wrong? Is this a "monk" type of a thing, or are you having him show you his blood sugars. He doesnt need anyone to check on this, but If I see fit, I will let you know when and if that ever becomes necessary. "

Then I hit send.