Friday, March 30, 2007

Dirty Job

I know what the dirtiest job in the world is.
Maybe you have seen the show "Dirty Jobs" in which a the host of the show goes to someones actual job and tries to make a go of it for the day. He goes to fertilizer plants, waste management, steel manufacturers, and performs the job as best he can. These jobs are usually tough, and you get really dirty... on the outside. But they are an honsest days living.
The type of job I am thinking about today does not cause one to get dirty on the outside. These people stay neat clean and nice looking all day long. They might even still smell good at the end of the day. But they are far from clean. They are dirty on the inside... the kind of dirty that does not wash off with soap and water. The kind of dirty that does not come off in the shower, and you cant get out of you with any type of transfusion or fasting or purification diet, or anything.
I am talking about doctors that work for insurance companies. Doctors that are paid by insurance companies to say NO to medical treatments that would make somebody better, prevent further illness or complications. The nurses too. They are paid to agree that whatever drug or treatment you actually need is not necessary, or still investigative. That is what they do for a living, crush peoples hope for a future.
These people went into the medical field, presumably, because they wanted to see people get better, but now... they are denying that basic human need.
How could they sell thier soul?
But they do, all the time, for the dollar bills to fill the void where the soul once was.
And that is what makes it the dirtiest job on earth.
and like I said, you cant wash off that kind of dirty. You just have to wait until you rot, right along with your sense of moral obligation.

4 comments:

nicole said...

:( Sounds like a rough day Jen. How did it go? We you refering to work or was it something to do with trying to get the CGMS?

Wendy Morgan said...

Great post! Love the accuracy of the described target!

Enjoying your blog. I wish there was a magic bullet that made parents feel better about all this. My little one was diagnosed at three years and 339 days old. I have had T1 since I was 14, so the pain I felt upon her diagnosis was intense; the deepest and soul-touching pain I have ever felt, because I knew intimately what her life would be like.

But six months after her diagnosis, I quit my life-draining job to work for myself and that changed everything for me. I began to really focus on taking care of myself, really putting myself at the top of the list and my family life changed for the better and so did my relationship with my daughter.

Her care got easier or at least I was less self-punishing over every high or low and my huisband and I got along better; we quit hurling blame at each other for every reading.

No magic bullet, but the more I focused on my own self-care as a woman and a mother, the better it was for my family. I learned a lot from a woman named Renee Trudeau who just released a book called "The Mother's Guide to Self Renewal," (http://www.reneetrudeau.com) and I still work hard to keep my sanity around T1.

I appreciate your posts and wish you the best!

Wendy

Jen said...

I think this was actually when they decided to only pay for 2 test strips a day. Or per week... something crazy. :)

Jen said...

Thank you. :)